To myself as a long term practitioner of Metta, Tantra is the logical extension of that practice. Tantra is the logical extension of Metta because in Tantra we treat all beings as sacred and worthy of respect, kind words and actions and as manifestations of The Sacred. In rejoicing in this, I abide in a state of being that is Metta. Tantra is a vehicle and expression of deep acts of kindness.
At the present time my understanding of Tantra is that it is a worship and experience of the Divine. the Sacred in ourselves and others. Thus I worship my wife, I see and take joy in the goodness in her. I take the time to give her gentle, tender, loving thoughts, words and deeds. I have the position of worshipping her. I take the time to bring out her best and to take joy in that. Thus I actively want, as part of my practice to fill her world with beauty and happiness. Rather than reading the latest awful thing from the newspaper, I, as part of worshipping her, read her Khalil Gibran or Rumi or Ryokan. I understand her taste in Classical music and fill the house with Albinoni's Adagio. I randomly embrace her, kiss her and tell her that she is loved.
When it comes to the sexual aspect, I take and rejoice in the time to massage her, to touch her gently, to awaken the energy in her, to bring her into a deep contact with her own body, I worship each and every part of her body and give them worship in the form of kisses, loving words and gentle touch, giving her intense pleasure along the way. This pleasure is an expression of the Divinity, The Sacred within all of us.
I give her my complete attention. My mind is firmly in the present. My wifes body is the incarnation of The Divine. Thus whilst I touch her in gentle, loving ways, I also speak in those same ways. I call her "Goddess" and tell her that I am worshipping her. I tell her that she is beautiful. This has caused an intense joy, a deep contentment, the deepest of this lifetime to arise in me.
When union happens, I call on and recognise the presence of The Goddess. Invoking The Goddess during these moments deepens the pleasure. By the time union happens we have both spent time worshipping The God and The Goddess. Our bodies are awake and sensitised to the moment. We have spent an hour or more touching and speaking in loving, gentle ways. We invoke The Goddess and The God. The result has been deep.
However there is much, much more to this than just another way to get our rocks off...even if we do want to clothe it in something resembling the sacred.
If I am the embodiment of The Sacred, a form of The God, then I have to treat this body better. To fill the body with pollutants is to offer them to The Sacred. I have to offer the best nutrition, exercise, rest and sacred spaces. This means to eat properly, to maintain a healthy weight and to exercise regularly. To cut down on the consumption of meat, alcohol and caffeine.
Understanding that those with whom we join are also manifestations of The Goddess and The God...as everyone is...is to understand that we are obliged to offer them beauty. Our bodies must be beautiful. A beautiful body is one that is healthy and fit. Embellishments such as tattoo's and piercings are not necessary.
Offering those we join with beauty is also to offer them beauty in the forms of our speech, touch and attitudes. If we approach them from the position of worshipping them and part of that worship is to give them pleasure, then we are already in the proper frame of mind for Tantra. Everything is Tantra and everyone is a manifestation of The Sacred, the inherently good.
With this as our approach it is easy to see where I view Tantra as an extension of my Metta practice. I have no regrets about the 23 years I spent as a Theravadin. They were valuable and useful years. I have left Theravada because the approach is too narrow and the divide between what is taught and what is practised too wide.
If, celibacy is an option for you, then do not criticise and belittle the sexually active. If leading a celibate monastic life is your choice, then do not devalue the life of the normal person...we feed you and pay your bills.
Theravada in the Lay arena is a joy free zone. It is stiflingly conservative and utterly devoid of imagination. There is no allowance for difference. I am an Aspergers, I will never fit the template that makes a Theravadin. I am loud, happy and larger than life. I am different and now well beyond all need to apologise for that difference,
My practice is Metta, my vehicle and expression is Tantra.
Beautiful, I couldn't have said it better.
ReplyDeleteMuch love.