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Saturday 7 July 2012

Love and Death


I practice a variety of meditations, however the ones I wish to discuss here are Metta (Loving-kindness) and Maranasati (Recollection of Death). They aren't as odd a pairing as you might think.
As I've written at length about Metta today I would like to explore Death.

The meditation on Death and it is specifically our own Death we meditate on, isn't as morbid as you might at first think. If anything it is a wonderfully powerful motivator and remover of bullshit.
The embrace of the absolute nearness of our own Death is profoundly liberating. The late and very great Steve Jobs found this. His approach was to be utterly fearless:

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important."
  
And this is the goal of the meditation. 
About 30years ago Laurence Khantipalo, then known as Bhikkhu Khantipalo contributed a meditation on Death to a introduction to meditation booklet. Below is Khantipalo's effort.

Death is certain. There is no possible way to escape death. life has a definite inflexible limit. each moment brings me closer to the finality of this life. death can come any time.

 
the duration of my lifespan is uncertain. many causes and circumstances can lead to death. the necessities of life such as food, clothes and transport can cause death. even such a small thing as a thorn in my foot can cause death if this wound becomes infected.

 
Only the practice of Dhamma, by reducing the chances of rebirth in the lower realms of existence will help me at the time of death. worldy posessions like wealth, position, money are of no benefit to me at the time of death. i am born with nothing and die with nothing. relatives and friends cannot prevent my death. i am born alone and i die alone. my own body, which i have cared for in this life is of no help at the time of death.

You can see where this needs some work. Khantipalo doesn't make it personal enough for a start. I nearly died recently courtesy of my friend Salmonella and the one thing that absolutely struck me was that I would have and ultimately will, die on a perfectly ordinary day. And this is true for all of us. We will die on a day just like today.

My Death is certain. There is no possible way for me to escape, bribe or outrun Death. My lifetime has an absolute limit and every breath brings me closer to the ending of my life. Death can and does come without warning. Death  arrives unannounced, one moment we are alive and planning our days and the next we are dead. Accidents happen all the time.

It is the simple, ordinary and every day things that can and do kill. Food, Ipods and cars kill people. Even something as simple as a bite of food or a septic wound can kill.

It is only  the practice of Dharma that will help me deal with and accept Death. The clutter of posessions, relationships, careers will not help me when I am dying. Often these things make it harder to die with many things left undone and unsaid. I must have my lifetime in such a place that should I die today, that nothing truly meaningful to me will be left unsaid or undone, especially acts and words of love. I must live with gentleness and kindness, for how I live will determine in a very large degree the state of my mind when I die. I can choose now to live and die with or without great mental suffering. My friends and relatives cannot do my dying for me. As surely as I came into this lifetime naked and bereft of posessions, I will leave it the same way. This body if not treated with proper care will often be the cause of death, so why should I turn to it for help at the time of Death?

 

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